Sexy Democrats

Let’s talk about Sexy Democrats. This is related to my post titled “Fear“. I remember saying that Obama was our Pimp Daddy, that Hillary was his bitch and that Trumpledick was a rich John. Billary was whored out to the Saudis by Obama.

I live in the ghetto. Being a pimp isn’t bad like my bougie white folk kin think it is. Pimp’s have money, nice clothes, nice cars and lots of girls. Obama is a pimp because he, like so many before him, promised us free shit we never got.

Sexy Democrats pine for the days when we convinced everyone that everything should be free–especially sex. We made abortion legal so the pesky problem of children could be dealt with. Contraception should be a right, we said. We believed that we were entitled to every pleasure, every benefit, every/anything we wanted without accountability or consequences.

Laws, Schmaws

The law was for other people. A sex fantasy island where you can get whatever freak on you desire was for us. Epstein’s place existed to provide a safe space for debauchery. Which would be paid for either in cash or in blackmail or both. Though, it’s not true, is it? Comet Ping Pong is just a pizza place. The Pegasus Museum has, uhm, artifacts in it, right?

I’ve been in the ghetto too long to believe people when they say they are more saintly than Mother Mary and more honest than Job. Usually, the one shouting his or her integrity all over social media is getting ass-fucked by donkeys.

Sexy Democrats hunger for free love the way most of us hunger for food. Their hunger means that sex is a currency to gain wealth or influence. No sex is ever free. Marriage is a business arrangement. Everything has a price.

We Need Our Money

Which is fine. Sort of. The problem is that they view us as bitches they can pimp out to their friends. They beat us into the hospital when we ask to be paid for the work we do.

Obama promised us many things, including money. We elected him to be our Pimp Daddy because we believed him. He said we could vote for Hope and Change and it would happen. We were offered money for our junk cars. Healthcare was going to be cheaper. Over eight years we found out that Hope and Change was a brand of concealer we had to buy ourselves.

Billary Clitorin warned us that if we didn’t make her our madame we’d get beat back to Patient First by Tangerine Nutsack. Trundlefuck was a racist, misogynist pig who would ruin the country and economy. She had her shopping list of things we would get if we elected her. We didn’t elect her.

We elected the rich John because of the century of sexy Democrats before the Clitorins who promised us money and free shit while putting the fear of those evil Republicans into us. Sexy Democrats who promised us that this time we would get our money and could stop lying to the Trauma Center about our bruises. That was 2016.

You Will Not

This is how it is with pimps and abusers. The hope is that once we leave the son-of-a-bitch the trouble will stop. It does not. Once we are gone the fight to get us back begins. It is a threat we have to live with.

The sexy Democrats told us he was a criminal with Russian dick callouses in his anus. He was a pig that liked to grab our pussy. Madame Clitorin said he stole the election. If we knew what was good for us we’d stop this silly nonsense and crown her as the rightful queen. TBH, Rue Paul is more entertaining.

He obstructed justice, violated the constitution, just fucking stunk up the whole damned White House with his rich white dude presence. Donaldo was uglier than a pig’s ass. The Dumpf is racist and hates women. He was a John, for god’s sake. He had no business sitting in the Oval Office. Any damned pimp would be better than Donaldo Dumpf.

We have a hard time forgetting the waiting room at Patient First. It wasn’t Trumplefuck who beat us into urgent care and promised us free shit. All the threats don’t scare us anymore. We are still waiting for money. We wanted out and electing the John was our way there.

Sexy Democrats

Since 2016 every damned pimp who ever tried to get with us has been at war with Marmalade Mussolini. There are 24 wanna-be pimps who want Sunburn Stalin’s job. Since forever it has been possible to leak a story to an infobabe that someone like Dreamsicle Demon was torturing goats and fucking young boys. CNN would breathlessly go 247365 with the accusation.

The drumbeat starts; that son of a bitch must resign. If he didn’t he would be impeached for being such a reprobate. It is a mortal sin to fight the accusation. Unless you are a member of the sexy Democrats. Then you get redemption.

Many credible unnamed sources said Orange Foolius was a pig. Once he got elected many said he was Putin’s bitch. PEEOTUS fought. He fought well. Over two years later it seems like he is winning. What insane, absurd nightmare is this that we can’t just accuse Pantone Beelzebub of getting ass-fucked by Putin and win? This nightmare, the nightmare we are living.

Gang of 24

Now, about the gang of 24 wanting a piece of Papaya Batista. Let’s start with Elizabeth Warren. Pocahontas is Obama’s side piece. Her campaign page is all about benjamins. She wants her money. So do we, baby. It’s been a century and we are getting tired of waiting. Yeah, she’s a multi-millionaire who thinks we are impressed when she has a beer on camera. She wants us to believe that she is just like us, that she understands, yes she does.

Pocahontas is a bitch who wants to go solo but belongs to Chicago and the Obamas. She’s in it for her own money. It must be really expensive to get jumped out of Chicago. She says it’s not about those sexy Democrats. No, it’s about rebuilding the middle class and ending corruption in Washington DC. Same shit every other bitch and pimp has been promising for a century.

Green New Deal

So, she ain’t got nothing for us. Her big idea isn’t even hers, it’s Alexandria Occasio-Cortez’. The Green New Deal is an AOC thing, not a Pocahontas thing. The rest of what Pocahontas wants to promise is more of the same shit–she’ll make John’s pay more and throw some of the increase our way. Obama said that and when we asked for our Jimmy Choo’s he beat us into the hospital. You’ll have to forgive us if we don’t trust a bitch.

✠ ✠ ✠

Say what you want about Cheetolini, he pays. All these pretty words about inclusivity and fighting climate change bore us. We want our money. There are bills to pay. The landlord doesn’t give a shit about inclusivity or endangered owls. He wants the rent and fucking him doesn’t change that. So we love Orange Shitweasel because his money is good. He does what he says and says what he does. We asked for Jimmy Choos and son of a bitch, an Amazon Prime driver showed up with our shoes. So President Tang gets mad respect.

Cheeto Satan does something nobody in Washington does. He says what he does and does what he says. The sexy Democrats say a lot of shit before getting jumped in. It’s all so pretty. Free shit for us, chickens in pots, cars, phones and maybe even Jimmy Choos. In the last two years, unemployment is at record lows. He threw us a tax cut. We been wanting to fight our pimps since forever and Trump is winning the fight.

Maga Hat

What’s been the reply from the sex and the Democrats? They want Trump’s head on a pike displayed on the National Mall in front of the National Museum of African American History and Culture. Some of the gang of 24 are promising to tear down the existing walls on our border with Mexico. Like we need more bitches competing with us for tricks.

Wiccan by the Bay

Who else . . . Kamala Harris belongs to Willie Brown. She’s part of the coven of Wiccan’s that include Nancy Pelosi, Diane Feinstein, and Barbara Boxer. She’s also a true believer of American Progressivism. So she promises more of the same shit. More money for us by making John’s pay more. Yeah ok. We are still waiting for our phones, Cadillac’s and Jimmy Choos. Harris may not be a bitch but she ain’t got her own money, so . . .

Kamala belongs to the San Francisco coven. If we elect her it will be four (eight) years of the full slate of California and San Francisco tyranny in the name of progress. More promises to pay us next time, honestly.

Sweet Shit Brown Words

Corey Booker ain’t no pimp. He’s a soldier for New York. But he’s brown and speaks well, kind of. CNN and others think he is a very sexy Democrat because he makes good copy. His shtick is picking at the scabs of old wounds so dearly loved by progressives. We can’t get our money and get beat so much because the rich John’s hate us for being brown and poor. Never mind that it is the soldiers and pimps who beat us and won’t pay.

Bernie’s pimp hand is weak. He’s got a shit-ton of money but argues with our pimp over every fucking penny. And he doesn’t tip. He smells like ass and bad moonshine.

Bernie keeps promising all this free shit: college tuition, health insurance, and a monthly check for doing nothing. First of all, Pocahontas promises all that and has a beer. Second, we ain’t got time for a rich John that tries to play us and say he ain’t got our money. Getting your nut off isn’t free. He’s got three houses and flies around in private jets. He ain’t got no money my ass. Third, he’s got old hippies and stoners creeping around looking for fresh pussy as supporters. Eeew.

Betel Nut

Listen, even if you are paying for it you have to have at least a little game. Betel Nut is a puppy with a squirrel. He has us but then acts like he doesn’t have a clue. Robert Francis O’Rourke (Betel Nut) is all hat and no cowboy. Plus, he’s all fronting like he’s got some Latino game but he’s white. Not even mildly respectable wigger white. No, he’s fake wetback white.

Betel Nut boy got nothing for us. His ideas are some vague thing about wanting us to maybe get paid more because John’s have too much money. No points for originality. He didn’t even know how to unhook our bra. We got naked. He gets all nervous and confesses that he is married. Seriously?

Fuck. Then we find out his money wasn’t any good. All that anticipation and we get nothing. Asshole.

Yesterday . . .

And . . . Joe Biden. Joe is old. He’s creepy. He thinks he is a sexy Democrat. He isn’t. He’s one of those sick bastard Johns with a taste for young Chinese and Russian pussy. He came to the house and while he was picking a girl, felt us up and told us our hair smelled good. Gross. His money comes from Delaware banks and labor unions. He used to belong to Chicago and HRH Obama. He tells us that we should be pissed because the rich have too much money and are racist. Uh huh. Joe is one of those, who accuse others of his own sins. Worst of all, he said Obama would pay for the girl. Obama doesn’t pay for shit and beats his girls, so there is that.

We can’t end this without Saint Peter Bootie Judge. Mayor Dick Beater is a Former Naval Intelligence and current mayor of South Bend, Indiana. He copied and pasted his big ideas from the DNC website. Very forgettable except he came to the house looking for dick and said he was a great judge of ass. Whatever. He likes dick so who cares.

Judge My Bootie

I don’t want to get distracted by Peter Beater Bootie Judge’s big idea. I’ll just say this. Many in history have tried to remove all evidence of a story by any means necessary. What we have of 道德清 is transcribed from memory by Lao Tzu’s (老子) surviving followers. Caesar banished Ovid to an island. We have Ovid’s Metamorphosis. Richmond, VA is nearly devoid of tangible evidence of our bitter history with slavery. We have plenty of museums and memorials heralding the heroes of the War Between the States. The story of slavery still lives.

You can kill people. Burn all the books that tell the offending story. You can repeal our First Amendment and lynch anyone who says anything offensive. Stories live even after those who remember are dead. So, Mayor Dick Beater, good luck with your idea to remove Thomas Jefferson’s name from the public record.

Last, the sad thing is that none of the gang of 24 has anything new to offer. It’s the same old shit: this time they’ll get it right and we’ll get paid and won’t have to use so much concealer. They have been saying the same shit for five generations. Every damned time we get them into the room and find out they ain’t got shit for us. So they leave and we are back at Patient First because we don’t have the money.


  1. You write well, but your content is in danger of self immolation.

    1. “your content is in danger of self-immolation” It would be good to see my words ignite in protest. What are we protesting?

  2. Take two aspirin and get a good night’s sleep.

    1. I did. Clearly, it didn’t make a difference.

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